Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

6/6/16, Spring Cleaning

Posted on June 3, 2016

Hi Everyone,

I hope that all is well with you, and that things are going well. I have had a bussssyyyyyy month, jam packed with projects, things on my ‘to do’ list, and writing. I feel like I haven’t stopped.

As I shared with you recently, I ‘attacked’ a big storage unit we had filled with years of old stuff, right down to my children’s art projects and baby clothes from years ago, one of my daughters saved every homework assignment from first grade through college. I kept all of that. But we also had A LOT of ‘stuff’, furniture of my mother’s that no one wanted, some REALLY ugly chairs of my grandmother’s, and some pretty things too, mostly furniture. For years anytime someone had something they didn’t know what to do with, the battle cry was ‘send it to storage’. They did, and for years I have wanted to weed it down, and get rid of what no one wanted, and never will again. I managed to reduce it to about half, and it was a HUGE job. I felt very virtuous for finally doing it. I set a date, and stuck to it, and did it. And I set a trend for the month: cleaning house and spring cleaning. I’ve been on a roll all month!!

Every year, I help one of my daughters get the family vacation home that they share, ready for summer. I don’t know how, but things just gather all year, and that turns into a huge cleanup project too before every summer, hosing things down, setting out cushions, repainting patio furniture. The place is very old, but has a lot of charm and they love it. They spent their childhood summers there, so they really love it. And having just cleared out a lot of the storage unit, I was much ‘tougher’ this year. If it was broken, we fixed it, if it couldn’t be fixed, we replaced it (at Ikea—–one of my favorite stores at very reasonable prices, and you can find everything for the home!!), if it was ugly, we finally faced that and dumped it, if no one wanted it and it was decent we sold it, and if it was less terrific, we donated it. We cleared the decks, and worked like dogs!!! With great results. They’re starting the summer free of cobwebs, and the junk that collected all year.

They also have a really small house they rent out, and that needed spring cleaning too for a new tenant, and we did the same thing there. I feel like I have spent the month moving furniture, cleaning everything, buying clean potholders, throwing out old ones. I have definitely done my spring cleaning for the year. Let me loose in your house right now, and I can strip it in an hour, dump all that stuff you don’t want, and convince you to go to Ikea to buy something (cheaper) and new!!! I’m a menace right now. After three major cleaning sessions—by the end of it, my battle cry was ‘get rid of it!! And we got some really cute stuff at Ikea, some new plates, pots and pans, some rugs, 2 benches. We had a ball!!! I love shopping there!!

So the illusion that I have a glamourous life is dispelled. I wore combat boots for most of the month, hauling a lot of broken old stuff to the trash. I love projects where you start out with a mess, and can see real results in a short time. It takes a long time to finish a book, and to solve most problems. Spring Cleaning has fast results, and you’re all proud of yourself when it’s done.

And after all that, I got to work on a new book. So it has been a busy month, now we can enjoy the summer—-and spend the rest of the year making a mess again!!! And as summer begins now, I hope you have some wonderful plans, to relax and take some time off (and read of course!!) Have a wonderful week!!

love, Danielle

5/30/16, Memorial Day

Posted on May 30, 2016

Hi Everyone,

I hope that wherever you are, you have a holiday, and are taking the day off today!! The Memorial Day weekend is special because it is the unofficial start of summer, even though summer doesn’t really start until June 21st. But this is the first long weekend of warmer days, with the promise of real summer just lining up. Kids are almost finished with school, college kids already are. Summer plans, summer jobs, summer days, summer camp, we have all of that still in store for us!!

I’ve been to two graduations in the last week, both of which meant a lot to me. One was the business school graduation of a young man who is very, very dear to my family, and to me. He has been part of our family for the past fifteen years. So I went to LA last week to attend his graduation. He worked hard for that degree, and I wanted to be there to cheer him on, and watch him receive it. I got up at 4 am, to be sure I wasn’t late, left my hotel at 6am, for the drive to his University, and be at the graduation when it started promptly at 8 am. I had lunch with him afterwards, with him and his friends and family, and then went back to San Francisco, with cherished memories of a special day, and very very proud of him.

Two days later, another graduate who is dear to my heart had her high school graduation. And I was watching young people in caps and gowns lining up for their diplomas once again. The high school seniors were livelier than their graduate school counterparts, and it was fun, an exciting moment that I felt privileged to share.

So with two graduations under my belt, summer is definitely just around the corner!!!

I’m spending this Memorial Day quietly working. I’ve never been exactly sure about the meaning of Memorial Day, if it was to remember one’s lost loved ones, or about Veterans, so I looked it up, and as you all probably know, it is to honor the men and women fallen in wars. And apparently the tradition began after the Civil War. So today, we honor the brave men and women who have defended us, and lost their lives in the wars, in service to their country. We are grateful to them for the freedoms they have protected and gave their lives for, and for keeping us safe. It’s a serious holiday, with a noble purpose.

I hope that you’ve had a wonderful day, and will have a happy week ahead. I still have lots of work to do, before I can abandon myself to the lazy days of summer a little later. I have to earn some time off first!!!

Take good care, and have a great week!!

love, Danielle

4/18/16, Internet Manners

Posted on April 18, 2016

Hi Everyone,

I recently had an experience, which I wanted to share. Times have changed with modern communications. Most people don’t write letters anymore, they send texts and emails. I miss the fine art of letter writing. I love books with love letters in them, or funny letters. Writing a great letter used to be an art, which almost no one bothers with anymore. Some people worked hard on the letters they sent, and I’ve always loved books which include letters, and am sorry letters have gone by the wayside. It’s a lost art now. And text and email is certainly faster and often more convenient, though less eloquent and less elegant. My agent writes some wonderful letters, and I always admire the elegance with which he can turn a phrase!!! My own letter writing is a little rusty these days. Who has time to write a great letter? Most of us don’t. » read more »

3/28/16, Robin Rocks!!

Posted on March 28, 2016

Hi Everyone,

I hope you had a lovely Easter, if that’s something you celebrate, or maybe even got to organize an Easter Egg Hunt, if you have little kids, or dyed some eggs in cool colors. This is the first year that I didn’t spend at least 2 weeks after Easter with purple, pink, red, green and blue fingers, from dyeing Easter eggs. I miss it!! That’s always so much fun. I had brunch with my children, which is how I like to spend it, a quiet, low key day, with an excuse to spend time with my kids. When I was a little kid, my parents gave a very fancy Easter brunch for their friends, everyone got very dressed up and there was dancing with a band. I used to dance with my father, which was fun for me, and my mother always wore a fabulous hat for Easter, the lunch they gave was very formal. She was very beautiful, and I always remember the gorgeous hats she wore. She had been a model, and was a very striking looking, remarkably beautiful woman all her life, and her hats were very glamourous!!! No one gets that dressed up for Easter anymore, but it was fun then.

I had THE MOST WONDERFUL experience a week ago. About once a year, if I’m very, very lucky, I get invited to be on Good Morning America, to promote one of my books, and the best part of it is being interviewed by Robin Roberts, who is truly one of THE NICEST people I’ve ever met. She exudes warmth and kindness, and is truly one of those people who just shines from within. She makes the guest feel totally at ease, warm and comfortable, and interviews you so kindly that she makes you feel ten feet tall, and so at ease you can put your best foot forward. Many interviewers have big egos, and the show is really more about them, and they are not particularly warm and cozy with their guests. Robin makes you feel like the most special person in the world. She is an absolutely beautiful woman, and she makes the whole experience fun and happy and exciting, you feel like a fairy princess for the minutes that you’re on.

The whole positive experience begins from the minute you arrive at the show, everything is set up to perfection, the producers are kind and welcoming, their assistants equally so, and then, there is the absolutely fantastic experience of sharing a few minutes with Robin. She makes every moment you are with her fun.

I had to be at the studio at 7:45 am, which is about a half hour from my hotel. So I had to leave the hotel on a snowy day at 7:15 am, and in order to be ‘camera ready’, the hair and makeup people came to my hotel at 4 am—-after I had just flown in the day before from Paris, so I looked and felt bleary eyed at 4am while getting my make up done. But by the time you get to the show, and stand in Robin’s remarkable aura, you no longer care how early you got up, how little sleep you had, how tired you are, it’s all worth it when you’re at the show with her!!!

I can’t say enough about Robin’s kindness, I have enjoyed the interview every time we’ve met, and I just hope I am lucky enough to see her again sometime soon. And until then, as my children would say, She ROCKS!!!! I just had to share that with you!!!

love, Danielle

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2/29/16, Happy Leap Year

Posted on February 29, 2016

Hi Everyone,

I hope it’s been a good week since I last wrote to you!! Today is leap year—or is it Leap Day?
I’m sure there is some very adult, astral explanation for why we get an extra day on our calendar once every four years. But the only one I’ve ever known is that on leap year, on the 29th of February, a woman can propose (marriage) to a man and she doesn’t have to wait for him to come up with the idea!!! Now I’m not entirely clear if a woman can only propose on February 29th, or does she get a pass to do it all year on a leap year? I suppose we could stretch the rules on that one!!! Why not? And get a pass all year!!! It’s interesting that, no matter how modern we’ve become, how feminist, or liberated, it still seems to be the tradition in traditional couples that a man is supposed to propose, and a woman is supposed to wait till he does, and I think even modern women stick with that tradition. I’ve never known a woman who proposed marriage to a man, but I’m sure there are some out there who have!! And proposals, among any and all couples of all sexes, are a BIG deal and a lot of planning goes into them, when and how, in what meaningful location, what special day, it’s a very important moment in one’s life and a memorable day. Some proposals are a big surprise, and unexpected, in other cases, the one being proposed to suspects it’s coming, but may not know exactly when. The current generation has an aversion to being ‘cheesy’. I was proposed to twice on Valentine’s Day and loved it, but when I’ve suggested it to younger friends, they make a horrible face and think that’s a terrible idea. Actually, several of the recent proposals I’ve heard about of people in their 30’s happened outdoors on a walk or a hike, which is nice for people who like the outdoors. Valentine’s Day at a dinner table (or in one case, at a fancy lunch) was more my style—I wouldn’t want to have to hike up a mountain to get engaged!!!

Which brings us back to leap day. If your true love didn’t propose on Valentine’s Day, if you’re a woman and holding back for that reason, you have a perfect opportunity on Leap Day!!! I think the Irish are very big on Leap Day. I’m not sure if they started the tradition or just enjoy it. There is a very cute romantic comedy called “Leap Year” with Amy Adams and Matthew Goode, (and yes, okay, it might qualify as a chick flick), about a Leap Year/Leap Day proposal. It’s a sweet movie and I really like it. I love romantic comedies when I just want to relax.

I’m not sure I’d have the courage to propose to a man, but who knows, maybe I would in the right circumstances (not on a hike though!!). And as much as some people are skittish about marriage these days, and either wait longer than they used to, or don’t do it at all, people still do get married, in all kinds of combinations and configurations, and The Proposal remains a major event in one’s life. So if Valentine’s Day didn’t pan out this year, then go for the Leap Year window of opportunity, and if you miss Leap Day, you can have a pass all year!! Whatever works, and whatever makes you happy. And for those of you brave enough to try it, Hurray!!! And good luck!!

I hope it works out just the way you want it to.

love, Danielle

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2/1/16, Karl Does it Again!

Posted on February 1, 2016

Hi Everyone,

I hope all is well with you!! I had a fun week last week, saw friends, went to a movie premiere of a film produced by a friend, about an in-school project, trying to discourage racial and religious discrimination among school age children. A really worthy subject, particularly in France, given the current tensions. One of my daughters had to work in Paris for a week, and as always, I really enjoyed her company, as I do all my children. She was busy, but it’s always nice seeing my kids coming and going out of my home, and living under the same roof with me, although it’s never for long enough!!! But I’m grateful for the time I get, and we managed to have dinner together twice.

The Big Event in Paris last week was Haute Couture week, which is only a 3 day event now. I’ve mentioned to you before that it used to be an entire week of fashion shows by important designers, running from one show to the next to see fabulous clothes modelled on the runway. Now there are only two important haute couture houses left: Dior and Chanel, and a handful of less known designers. And one very glamourous one: Elie Saab who makes beautiful sexy evening gowns, but since I don’t wear them and don’t have a life that requires them, I’ve never gone to their show. I wear less elaborate clothes, that I can wear in the daytime, or for an informal dinner out. I have a closet full of evening gowns that I never, or rarely, wear anymore, and am saving them for my daughters. Some are quite beautiful, and are even museum pieces, made by designers who either don’t do them anymore, or are no longer alive. Most of what I’ve saved, of haute couture, is by Dior, Givenchy, Balmain (when it was still a couture house), and Chanel. They are gorgeous clothes for daytime and evening, by remarkable designers, who were really great artists. Hubert de Givenchy, who is still alive though retired, and a cherished friend—-designed Audrey Hepburn’s private wardrobe, and for all her films. He is the last truly great gentleman and an amazing man, with unlimited talent. At the time when I bought a lot of Christian Dior Haute Couture, it was designed by Gianfranco Ferre, an Italian designer, who was replaced by John Galliano (British). I used to buy a lot of Balmain Haute Couture (and still have all of it, and the clothes by Dior), when it was designed by Oscar de la Renta, who eventually retired from Balmain to continue his own brand, and died last year, much to my sorrow. And Chanel ready to wear and Haute Couture is designed by Karl Lagerfeld (he’s German), he is a powerhouse of creative genius and astounding energy, and still designs for three brands at eighty five. The extent and level of his talent is amazing and dazzling. He is constantly ahead of his time, and sets the fashions. His ready to wear shows are the biggest in fashion, presenting more looks than anyone else (Over 100 each time, most designers show about 30 looks now). One interesting side bar is that I bought Haute Couture over many years, for a long time. My grandmother bought it for me when I married in my teens. My mother in law very generously gave me some pieces when I was married to her son. And once I ‘grew up’ and became successful I bought it for myself, and sometimes even a lot of it. But the prices then (and not that long ago) were the same or less than what ready to wear clothes cost now. The price of Haute Couture today is enormous, and nothing like the more reasonable prices of a decade or two ago. And designers I knew well sometimes sold me samples, with evening gowns that were exquisite for less than a ready to wear wool jacket or coat would cost today. Much of what is shown on the runway in Haute Couture shows now is never made. It is simply part of the show and ‘spectacle’, as publicity for the house that made them. There are very few buyers for Haute Couture today, due to the more casual lifestyle now, and with the high prices, there are far fewer people around the world who can afford it. But for me, it has always been a form of art. I studied fashion design at Parsons in New York, and it’s a thrill to see an haute couture show even if I don’t buy it. It is a true art form, and in a way the summit of fashion. » read more »

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1/11/16, Roller Coaster

Posted on January 11, 2016

Hi Everyone,

It’s a cold, rainy Sunday in New York, and I’m visiting two of my children, which is always a joy for me. We had dinner together last night, will have brunch today and hang out together, which is always a gift for me.

I was just thinking about the roller coaster of life, the shocks and not always good surprises that life broadsides us with. It happens to us all. And the bigger the life, the rougher the ride sometimes. I’ve spent the last two and a half weeks since Christmas, visiting two people I love in the hospital, both very sick. One hit unexpectedly with an illness they had 2 chances in a million to catch, the other sick for a long time. It makes you realize again how quickly things can change. Someone I work with had an accident in LA during the holidays and had to be flown back to New York in an ambulance plane for surgery. And I heard from a close friend last night, that his business partner had pulled a power move and tried to shut him out of his business this week, which is going to involve a lot of legal work to straighten it out. It’s the second story I’ve heard like it recently, of people being pushed out of their jobs or business by someone they trusted. It happens to all of us—-we get hit like a ton of bricks by something we didn’t expect. It’s part of life, and definitely not the fun part!!!

I don’t have any great Pollyanna answers about how to deal with the tough things that happen to us unexpectedly. You just have to hang on, go through it, do the best you can, and hope for a good outcome. And no question, long term, sometimes blessings come from it, a stronger relationship, a better job or partnership, a rethinking of what we care about most, a deeper appreciation for the good times and good people in our lives. And I’ve had times when I’ve been thrown for a loop too, in business or my personal life. Big stuff, not just small stuff, and I’m sure those things have happened to you too!!! No one is exempt. Great things happen, but so do hard ones, and suddenly an easy day becomes a very hard one, and some things take a long time to resolve.

Someone sent me a greeting card once that said “Life is like a roller coaster ride” (with a picture of a kid screaming on a roller coaster on the front) and inside” First you scream, and then you throw up”. All true. But after that, you have to hang on for dear life, figure out how to survive it, how to deal with it, and what the best outcome will be (sometimes with unusual solutions you’d never thought of before), and how to make the best of it. Sometimes endurance serves us best, and perseverance, getting through a big problem day by day, or even hour by hour, until the bad time has passed.

I’m sharing this with you in case you’re on the ‘scream-y’ part of the roller coaster ride, and if you’ve been broadsided by some big event that’s challenging you. Hang on!!! The ride does smooth out again in time. We forget that when we’re in the midst of it. The problems do get solved, and somehow we survive it. There will always be unexpected storms in this lifetime, even tornadoes and hurricanes, it’s all about how we survive them, and the things we learn while going through them. It’s not the fun part, but it’s part of the deal. So onward through the storms, and if you’re on the roller coaster ride right now, HANG ON!!!! And whatever is happening, it will smooth out again….I remind myself of that too!!!

much love, Danielle

1/4/16, Brand New Year

Posted on January 4, 2016

Hi Everyone,

Happy New Year!!!! I hope that whatever you did on New Year’s eve was fun, and if you had too much fun, by now you have started to recover, and feel fresh and ready to face a brand new year, like a clean slate, ready for you to write on!! I think we all forget sometimes how much of what we do, we can determine ourselves. So we should all think about how we want this year to go, and in what direction. Do we want to slow down and take it easy, smell the roses, and not work as hard? Or rev up our engines and do more, start new projects, or a new business? Do we want to meet new people and get out more, or stay home more and not race around quite as much. Are we ready for a new relationship, or know we should end an old one if it’s not working. Do we need or want to spend more time with our kids….or have a child, or move to a new home or apartment? Look for a new job? Or work harder at the old one? Take better care of ourselves, change our hair color or our look? Or get a new puppy? Lose or gain weight? Get more exercise? The possibilities are endless, and there are always surprises and things we can’t control in life, but at least we can head in the right direction—-whatever that direction means to us. » read more »

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12/28/15, Goodbye 2015, New Vistas up ahead

Posted on December 28, 2015

Hi Everyone,

I hope your Christmas, or Chanukah, holidays were wonderful. I had a really terrific time with all my kids, and got wonderful gifts I REALLY loved from them. But the best gift of all was being with them, and sharing family time. We were all so grateful to be together. And our holiday time is almost over. They leave tomorrow, and on Tuesday, I’ll be at my desk, back at work, working on books for the months ahead. So my holidays are drawing to a close. Each one of my kids gave me special gifts, but their presence at home was what I cherished most. One of my daughters gave me gorgeous evening shoes, with “I love you, Mommy” written in sequins in French, and a gold bracelet that says I love you, and a bunch of other lovely presents too. Two of my daughters gave me a beautiful little table from the l950’s, by a furniture designer whose work I love, it has an Asian scene on it, and I put it in the living room. Knowing how I love shoes, several of my daughters gave me shoes I’m crazy about. And another of my daughters gave me two great jade bracelets and a necklace. One of my older sons gave me a fantastic giant poster (about 5 feet high and 5 feet wide) with photographs of 9 antique typewriters, and the words “Mom” and “Love” and other words typed out. And my youngest son gave me a little journal I will cherish forever, where he wrote down his favorite memories with me, of things we’ve done together, and a ski trip we took together about 5 years ago, he wrote down all the things he loves about our relationship, what he admires in me, what he feels I’ve taught him, and the advice I’ve shared. it is an incredible gift of love, and said things any mother would give just about anything to hear. They were all incredibly generous and thoughtful, and we shared some wonderful meals and fun times together. We are all sad to see the holidays end as they pack to leave.
» read more »

12/21/15, Miracles

Posted on December 21, 2015

Hi Everyone,

I hope you’re not totally frazzled, worn out, and unnerved by now, trying to get everything done and wrapped up before Christmas. It can be a frantic time of year, even for the most organized people, a happy time, or a sad one, depending on where we are in our lives at the moment. It will undeniably be a hard time this year for those who have suffered losses of loved ones in some of the violent and tragic events that have caught our attention around the world. For those people, these holidays won’t be easy. My family went through that when we lost my son Nick three months before Christmas several years ago. Christmas was tough, and we struggled to make it the best we could, reaching out to friends, staying close with our family, and trying to make sense of life, and not totally losing our sense of joy at a very hard time for us, despite such a huge loss.

We can’t ignore, and I can’t ignore, the hard public events that have happened in the past year, the unrest all around us, the uncertainties in our future, about safety, disturbing political situations, the economy in almost every country. We don’t live in easy times, and it presents a challenge to each of us, as to how we view it, what we do about it, what we tell our children, how we explain things that even we don’t understand, and that are almost impossible to understand, and in some ways the senseless violence that threatens us all in some form.

What I find is that in many cases, it is driving people back to our basic and original traditions—–rather than disrupting our lives and tearing them apart forever, it is bringing back and strengthening some of the things we hold most dear: love of family, simple values and traditions, the importance of our friends, some of the smallest things and gestures in our lives are suddenly infinitely more dear. In some cases, it is making people kinder and more compassionate, reaching out to others, cherishing their relatives and friends. It makes each moment we spend with our children dearer and more important. The risks in the world today make each day seem like a gift.

Each of us have our traditions surrounding the holidays, Christmas or Chanukah, or customs in other cultures to mark the end of the year, traditions involving gifts or food or friendship or religion, which bring us comfort and give us a solid foundation to stand on. I think that when the world is troubled, the simple basics become more important. Although it’s certainly fun to get a fabulous gift, the kind gesture of a friend, or some small token from someone you don’t know well, a thoughtful reaching out in some way, baking something, giving something meaningful, doing something kind and small, touches the heart deeply.

I read recently “If you want a miracle, be a miracle to someone”, we all have that opportunity every day, to reach out, to be kind, and to pay attention when someone seems in distress or needs a hand. I know myself that whenever I was having a hard time with something in my life, the smallest gesture sometimes even from a stranger, even a smile, becomes meaningful, and can change an entire day.

We don’t have to have lived through tragedy to face challenging times. We all get stressed and pushed, and a day can head in the wrong direction, or we could be coincidentally dealing with major issues in our lives during the holidays. Someone reaching out to you then can change everything, can turn the day around. And at a time when it is easy to feel overwhelmed, like at the holidays, what better time to take a minute to smile, or lend a hand, call someone you know and may not have talked to for a while, or embrace the people you know and are grateful for, to tell our children how much we love them, praise our coworkers or cherish a friend, those are sometimes the most precious gifts to all of us. We may not even realize that someone we know is having a hard time, and your kind gesture may change everything for them.

I love buying gifts for my children and friends, for employees and coworkers and people who have been kind and helpful to me during the year (and my January budget is usually a mess as a result, but it’s worth it), but we forget sometimes what a huge difference a tiny gesture can make. It’s hard to think of it at times, to remember, to take the time and act on it, when we are all busy and stressed, but being a miracle to someone seems like the essence of the holidays to me. Some of the gifts that have meant the most to me are the gestures I least expected, something someone made me, or did for me. I try to remind myself of that when I rush around, trying to get everything done: pick out Christmas trees, decorate them, entertain friends, or do special things with my children that they will enjoy and hopefully remember for years. This year it seems particularly important to embrace our traditions, establish new ones, to reach out with generosity and compassion, rather than turning inward in despair and fear.

It’s up to each of us to set the example, to be a beacon of love and warmth, to shine brightly, to cast light into the world, instead of darkness.

May your holidays shine brightly, may your hearts be warm, and may we each be a miracle to someone in some small way. Our lights combined will light up the world with love and hope. And from the bottom of my heart, I wish each of you a Merry Christmas, or whatever holiday you celebrate, I thank you for your kindness to me all year, for reading my books, for your letters and comments, for caring about me and my family. May our love for each other, all of us, light the world, just as you light up my days and warm my heart. May you and those you love be blessed and warm and safe during these holidays and always.

with all my love, Danielle

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