Hi Everyone,

Congratulations!!! You made it through the holidays. I had a really nice one with my kids. The best holiday of all is one with my children. I ignored New Year’s Eve, was working on a new book, which I really enjoy doing. It’s the perfect way for me to end the old year and start the new one.

There seems to be a lot of grumbling that 2016 was a dicey year. Life is a mixed bag….blessings, heart aches, problems, disappointments, happy times, and joys and great surprises. If this is multiple choice, I pick happy!!! But it’s not always (or ever?) up to us.

So today, as we begin the year, before the year is old enough to complain about—–I want to start with a clean slate and wish YOU THE HAPPIEST, BEST, FUN-EST, HEALTHIEST, RICHEST, MOST ABUNDANT, WONDERFUL-EST year EVER!!!!

I hope it will be a GREAT one with some wonderful times, and fabulous surprises in store!!!

all my love, Danielle

Hi Everyone,

It’s Christmas week, and I know how exciting and fun the holidays can be—-and also how difficult, lonely, and challenging they can be. No one to be with, not enough money, alone in a new city, or at home with a family you don’t get along with, or in the midst of a divorce, just after a break up, or after you lose a loved one. The holidays are not as easy and simple as they look on Christmas cards, or in the movies. It’s a time when we are acutely aware of whatever is missing in our lives, or whatever is difficult. I’ve had my share of difficult Christmases too, a long time ago, when I was divorced, and barely three months after my son Nick died at 19. That was a brutal year. Oddly, I worked harder on making Christmas special for my family in the hard years, than in the easy ones. And sometimes those Christmases turned out the best—the ones I expected to be terrible, and then they weren’t. Trying to cheer up my children after Nick died, I gave a skating party that year for my friends and their children. It didn’t bring Nick back, but it was a warm, loving event that became a tradition we loved every year, until all my kids left for college and everyone else’s kids grew up too, and we stopped doing it. But it was a lovely time of families joining each other during the holidays. We’ve all had our tough years, they’re part of life.

We’ve always been about twenty or more, at our holiday table, for dinner on Christmas eve, they’ve always been loud, happy, fun events, with a visit from Santa during dinner. it’s a grown up, dressed up event, and on Christmas night, the next day, we have Christmas dinner with the whole family and all the children in the family, it’s more informal, and really a fun night. Five years ago, my ex husband John (whom we spent all holidays with even when we were no longer married) had recently died, and all my older children went to their in laws for the holidays, and instead of 20 at the table, and John being elegant and jovial and loving among us, we were going to be the 5 younger children and me for dinner on both nights: 6 of us, not twenty, no older kids, and no John. It was a radical change, and a sad time we were all wrestling with, and there was no way to pretend that it was going to be the same, or even a happy event, and we were all dreading it. So I decided to really turn it upside down, and told my 5 younger kids, in their early 20s, that they could do Christmas however they wanted that year. We could get dressed up, as we always did, and have a serious formal dinner, or wear blue jeans and eat pizza, or no dinner, invite friends or not, go to the movies, or go bowling, or leave town together—-if it was going to be different, I invited them to make it as different as they wanted. We didn’t have to please anyone but ourselves and each other. After discussing it among themselves, they decided they still wanted to get dressed up and stay at home, still go to mass on Christmas eve, and no one felt up to having friends over, but they wanted to play games at dinner, and we collected a bunch of ridiculous party games, including the White Elephant game, where everyone brings a gift of some kind, you don’t know who brought it, and you take turns and randomly pick a gift. If someone else likes the gift, they can steal it 3 times, and after that you’re safe, if you like the gift it’s yours. Let me tell you, it was ridiculous, the gifts were funny, everyone stole everything from everyone else, my youngest son flatly refused to give up his Chewbacca (from Star Wars) back pack, which he said he was going to wear to the office. We were loud and silly, had fun, we played lots of games, and cuddled up together and watched movies afterwards, and ate popcorn. Somehow just being together worked, we didn’t have to ‘behave’, and we all missed John terribly, but the love and laughter between us got us through the evening, and it was one of our sweetest holidays. I still have the pink ballet tutu that I stole from two of my daughters during the white elephant game. Sometimes you just have to make the best of what is, when things are different or not the way you hoped, like watching all your favorite movies on TV or DVD if you’re alone.

And I know it’s hard to be alone during the holidays. I hope that you can be with your family, or with friends, or people you like, or bring joy to someone else. And if Christmas isn’t quite the way you want it to be this year, I hope that you get through it peacefully, and that it will be better next year. Life changes, it flows, it gets better, and worse and better again, and everything does not depend on how great your Christmas is. I hope it will be a good one, even a great one, and if it is a small one this year, I hope that you can cherish it, and enjoy it anyway. I send you all my good thoughts, and thanks and love on this holiday, whatever your holidays, and I wish you a beautiful new year!!

with all my love, Danielle

Hi Everyone,

I hope you had a good week—Wow the year is whizzing by. I’m always stunned when the holidays roll around. The year has really sped by. I had a VERY busy week this week, editing some writing, adding research to two books, working on a new outline, picking book covers, doing errands, Christmas shopping, going to the dentist, meeting with a new attorney to replace one who retired, and working with the puppy trainer to introduce Minnie and Blue to the new puppy in the least stressful way for them. I had dinner out with friends three times, and also dinner with my youngest son. AND I did something really fun—-a woman friend invited me to a matinee of the King and I, one of my very favorite musicals. She asked me months ago, and the day finally came, and I just loved it. I love the songs and know them all, and it was a really lovely, happy interlude in my week. So it’s been a very nice week, and next week my children will be home for Thanksgiving, which is always a wonderful time for me.

Thanksgiving is always a lovely way to spend time with family and friends, but what I like best about Thanksgiving (even more than all the yummy food) is what it symbolizes: gratitude, being grateful/ thankful for the good things in our lives, whether family or friends, our jobs, or opportunities, or the good things that happened this year. We don’t always have the time to think about what we’re grateful for, and to count our blessings. Thanksgiving is a day dedicated to that. I know it can be difficult too, with challenging families, or no families, or difficult families, or hard circumstances sometimes. Its nice spending the day with people we care about, but sometimes we find ourselves alone, thinking of what others have and we don’t. If we can take time out to be grateful for what we do have, to give thanks for the small things in our lives, our lives become richer from that gratitude. So whether you are alone, or surrounded by loved ones, in a good space, or not having a great time, I hope that all of us will find the time and the grace to be grateful for even a few things, even one thing in our life. Gratitude is like a seed that you plant, that becomes a tall tree eventually, with leaves of gratitude that grow and multiply. Gratitude is an enormous blessing available to all of us.

I was alone one Thanksgiving many years ago, in a new city, divorced, with no friends yet, and my daughter was visiting her father far away. I came across the Bible verse “God places the solitary in families”. And I’ve had many occasions to remember that, grateful for my family, and the friends I’ve made over the years. May your Thanksgiving be filled with warmth and blessings, and good people. And may we all remember to reach out to those who are alone. And on the list of things I am thankful for, you, my readers are high on that list. Thank you!! I am VERY grateful to and for you…..I hope you will have a wonderful holiday!!!

with much love, Danielle

Hi Everyone,

I hope that wherever you are, you have a holiday, and are taking the day off today!! The Memorial Day weekend is special because it is the unofficial start of summer, even though summer doesn’t really start until June 21st. But this is the first long weekend of warmer days, with the promise of real summer just lining up. Kids are almost finished with school, college kids already are. Summer plans, summer jobs, summer days, summer camp, we have all of that still in store for us!!

I’ve been to two graduations in the last week, both of which meant a lot to me. One was the business school graduation of a young man who is very, very dear to my family, and to me. He has been part of our family for the past fifteen years. So I went to LA last week to attend his graduation. He worked hard for that degree, and I wanted to be there to cheer him on, and watch him receive it. I got up at 4 am, to be sure I wasn’t late, left my hotel at 6am, for the drive to his University, and be at the graduation when it started promptly at 8 am. I had lunch with him afterwards, with him and his friends and family, and then went back to San Francisco, with cherished memories of a special day, and very very proud of him.

Two days later, another graduate who is dear to my heart had her high school graduation. And I was watching young people in caps and gowns lining up for their diplomas once again. The high school seniors were livelier than their graduate school counterparts, and it was fun, an exciting moment that I felt privileged to share.

So with two graduations under my belt, summer is definitely just around the corner!!!

I’m spending this Memorial Day quietly working. I’ve never been exactly sure about the meaning of Memorial Day, if it was to remember one’s lost loved ones, or about Veterans, so I looked it up, and as you all probably know, it is to honor the men and women fallen in wars. And apparently the tradition began after the Civil War. So today, we honor the brave men and women who have defended us, and lost their lives in the wars, in service to their country. We are grateful to them for the freedoms they have protected and gave their lives for, and for keeping us safe. It’s a serious holiday, with a noble purpose.

I hope that you’ve had a wonderful day, and will have a happy week ahead. I still have lots of work to do, before I can abandon myself to the lazy days of summer a little later. I have to earn some time off first!!!

Take good care, and have a great week!!

love, Danielle