Archive for the ‘Current Events’ Category

6/15/15, A Different Kind of White Magic

Posted on June 15, 2015

Hi Everyone,

I recently had one of those great fun experiences that I love to share with you. I’ve told you before about the White Dinner that I go to in Paris every year. Six people organize it, thousands of people are invited and attend (by invitation only). They are told at roughly 6:30 pm to come to a meeting place bringing a table, 2 chairs, their meal, it must be elegant and not a picnic, and you must be wearing white from head to foot (It was started about 26 years ago, by a naval officer, who invited friends to join him and his wife for their anniversary, in front of one of the monuments in Paris. And it has become an annual tradition since then). You must go to the meeting place at 7:30 pm, you stand around with your friends, or strangers, and at 8:45 pm, you are told the REAL location of the dinner, always about a 5 or 10 minute walk away from the meeting point, (carrying all your equipment, table, chairs and meal). And the dinner is held in front of one of Paris’ spectacular monuments. This was my fourth one, invited by a close friend who invites me every year—-and you are invited as a couple, so there must be two of you—–and I have been to the White Dinner in front of Notre Dame Cathedral (which was beyond spectacular!!), in front of the Louvre amid the glass pyramids all lit up, and last year on the vast lawn in front of the Invalides. The group has gotten so large over the years, that I believe it reached 14,000 by last year, divided into 2 groups, at 2 locations. The remarkable thing about it is that it is kept secret until the last minute, thousands of people show up wearing only white, NO ONE ever tries to crash the event, and with the backdrop of the monuments of Paris, it is an exquisitely beautiful event visually, and everyone behaves impeccably. By 9 pm you reach your final destination.

White Dinner 2015

White Dinner 2015

You set up your table WITH tablecloth and napkins, candles, real plates and glasses and cutlery (NO picnic stuff), and by 9:15 you are seated. It is done with minute precision, when you arrive you are assigned a spot just big enough for your small folding table for two, and you have to set it down where they tell you. You can’t wing it, or decide you prefer a different spot. The table locations are assigned in long, long rows, and when the organizers point to H127, or B223, that’s where you set up, not ten feet away from it, or somewhere else where you spot a friend. The spots are calculated by the inch. The small tables for 2 form a long line of diners, women on one side, men on the other. And as you begin the meal in the festive atmosphere, darkness falls, candles are lit on the tables. And at midnight, you are handed sparklers, you stand and hold them aloft, and the entire location is lit by candlelight and sparklers, a truly dazzling sight. There is music after that if you want to dance. DSC04147And some years, people have brought beautiful Chinese paper lanterns that they light and sail up into the night sky. And the final rule is that The White Dinner ends at 1 am, at 1am like Cinderella (only an hour later), your stuff must be packed up, you have to leave the location IMMACULATE, not a shred of paper, cigarette butt (it’s France!!), wine cork or so much as a raisin can be lying around where you were. You take your garbage with you, and as the evening ends, there must be NO evidence that anyone was ever there. The event is not to disrespect the city or create clean up work for others, it is to celebrate the beauty of the city, and respect it unfailingly. Every single time I have been, it has been absolutely magical, and one of the most exciting nights of my life. Last year and the year before, I think there were 10,000 people at the location where I was, but it didn’t look like that many. It is NEVER rowdy, but just pure good respectful fun, and it amazes me that no one tries to crash. The night is all about respect, for each other and the city. (The event has been imitated in other cities, but Paris is the original one. » read more »

5/18/15, Woman In Gold

Posted on May 18, 2015

Hi Everyone,

How are you?? All is good with you, I hope!!!

I had a wonderful Mother’s Day with my kids a week ago, and felt very spoiled. Brunch at home, and dinner out with some of them, and one flew in specially, and I had had a lovely time in New York before that with two of my girls. We have passed the stage of macaroni necklaces and Kleenex boxes decorated with flowers and beads (which I loved and kept them all!!), and I always miss that and remember it fondly, but sometimes it’s nice having grown up kids that you can really spend time with and enjoy. So I had a great one, which I really appreciated. My kids saw to it that I had a great time and was spoiled!!! And felt very loved, just as I love them.

I don’t very often get a chance to go to movies, since I usually work at night, but I had finished a big block of work this week, and decided to treat myself to a little time off, and on the spur of the moment went to a late movie when I finished work. I had heard the name of the movie, but didn’t know much about it, “Woman in Gold”, with Helen Mirren and Ryan Reynolds. It’s a true story about an Austrian woman, from a previously wealthy Jewish family in Vienna, before the war, that lost everything they had to the Nazis. They had a beautiful home in Vienna, and collected spectacular, famous and very valuable works of art. They had collected the work of Gustav Klimt, whose paintings I have always loved. They are mostly gold, typical of the 1930’s, with beautiful women in them. One of my favorite ones is called “The Kiss”. And in fact, I’ve used one of the Klimt paintings as art work on a book cover, when it seemed appropriate. And in the case of the woman the movie is about, one of Klimt’s most famous paintings of a beautiful woman was a portrait of her aunt. the Kiss
» read more »

3/16/15, Chanel!!!

Posted on March 16, 2015

Hi Everyone,

I hope that all is well with you and that a hint of Spring is in the air and just around the corner.

I wanted to give you my last report of Paris fashion week as it draws to a close for this season, and as usual, I wound up my participation with a flourish: the always impressive, dazzling, fantabulous Chanel show. It is always an ASTOUNDING fantastic show, and today was very much in keeping with their ready to wear tradition of gorgeous clothes. One of the most impressive things about the Chanel ready to wear fashion show (as opposed to Haute Couture, which is loftier, more elitist, all made to order and hand made, whereas the ready to wear clothes are mass produced, and Chanel is at the very high end of the ready to wear market)—but one of the things that makes the show special and different is the lengths they go to with the setting and decor. They go ALL OUT and spend millions to make the setting and backdrop of the show an event you will never forget. One year, they had a giant, and I mean GIANT, like 30 feet high maybe, gold lion center stage, with the models coming out of its mouth and onto the runway. The one that I will never forget was when they flew in a small iceberg from Sweden, put it in the middle of the Grand Palais, a fabulous glass palace where they hold their shows—–the models walked around the iceberg, the room was freezing to preserve the iceberg, and after the show, it was flown back to Sweden, and set back down in its natural habitat. Last year, Chanel created a “supermarket”, an extraordinary replica of one, with real food in it, and where the models strode around with shopping carts, wearing gorgeous mostly casual clothes, to show the collection. I was sooooo excited by the fun setting that I hardly noticed the clothes, I wasn’t sure where to look or what to watch, the beautiful clothes, or the amazing setting where the groceries had fun names. This time, the setting was still the Grand Palais, which had been transformed into the Brasserie Gabrielle, —-a brasserie is like a bistro, an informal restaurant, and it looked like a real restaurant. As you entered, there was a bar, where coffee, orange juice and croissants were being served. Then you made your way to your assigned seat (with your name on it). And there were tables set up for both male and female models wearing the collection, on the other side of the runway, while waiters waited to take their ‘orders’, as part of the staging. By comparison, Balenciaga who had one of the most beautiful shows of the season clothes-wise, did their show in a half finished construction site, and Celine did their show on the courts of a tennis club. But Chanel doesn’t do things by half. They go ALLLL OUTTTT, and they sure did with the bistro setting today!!! » read more »

3/9/15, Paris Fashion Week

Posted on March 9, 2015

Hi Everyone!!!

Despite hideous, cold, snowy, awful weather in most of the US, particularly the East, it’s springtime in Paris. It’s almost embarrassing to admit it, sunny, with still a little nip in the air, but beautiful weather, and it feels like spring, with temperatures in the 60’s. And it has been challenging to get to Paris for all the buyers and editors coming from the States. One of my daughters had a 25 hour flight from LA to Paris (normally a 10 or 11 hour flight), with an emergency landing in Boston, and a stop in New York, in a blizzard, and long delays. And many flights were cancelled, while the East of the US was pummeled by snow storms and arctic temperatures—-all of which made arriving in Paris, in the sunshine, with gentle weather, seem even more magical. And it’s that wild, busy, chaotic exciting week in Paris again, with the fashion shows of all the major French designers, packed in day by day for 8 days, while fashion magazine editors, store buyers, designers, stylists, models, international press from all over the world, come to Paris to run from one location to another to see the runway shows of each French designer’s line of women’s clothing for the upcoming fall and winter season. They show the clothes 6 months in advance, so stores can order them, and the manufacturers can make them in time for the fall/winter season. (Spring summer clothes are shown in September, also 6 months in advance of when they’ll be available in stores. Fashion week is an advance look at the next season, for the entire world to observe). And if you can’t get to the shows, you can see them all, listed by designer, on style.com

» read more »

2/9/15, Happy Hearts!!!

Posted on February 9, 2015

Hi Everyone,

I’ve been whipping through various cities, all of them freezing cold, and some of them buried in snow. I love snow until it gets messy, and this is the time of year when we’re all a little tired of winter and gray weather, but spring still seems like it’s a long way off in most places. And this time of year is always a good time for me to work. And I’ve been busy at my desk, writing and editing.

I suddenly realized that Valentine’s Day is only days away, which I always face with a little trepidation, sweet memories, and a bit of hope. I have a sweet piece I wrote in the February issue of Harper’s Bazaar this month, about when my husband John, (father of eight of my nine children, whom I was married to for 17 years) proposed to me on Valentine’s Day. I’d have to say that that was my best Valentine’s Day, with the most successful results (despite the divorce 17 years later, we stayed very close in spite of it). And we shared some great Valentine’s Days in between. And my husband after that filled a hotel room with roses and rose petals on Valentine’s Day, and we were married 6 weeks later, and we remain very close and good friends too. So I really can’t complain. Two great Valentine’s Days in one lifetime is a pretty good score, even if the other Valentine’s Days were not quite as romantic or exciting, and sometimes downright dull. One of my daughters, who is currently not involved with anyone, said the other day with a look of disgust, “It’s a stupid day, designed to make us feel awful and like losers if we don’t have a boyfriend”. She has a point there too. It’s a day when those of us who are not in relationships stick out like rocks in a stream, as the waters flow around us. I told you several years ago in a blog about the year Valentine’s Day fell on a Sunday and I went to church, where the priest asked everyone in couples to stand up so the rest of us could applaud them, and they handed each couple two roses, while the rest of us slunk out of church alone and empty handed, even more depressed than when we came in. No roses for the ‘losers’!!! I complained to the priest afterwards and said that we should have gotten the roses to make us feel better, the couples had each other. But on Valentine’s Day, the world celebrates lovers, and the rest of us eat chocolates we buy ourselves as consolation. It’s an easy day to feel sorry for ourselves if our love life isn’t as we wish it would be. And let’s face it, EVERY year can’t be romantic, and a lot of men think Valentine’s Day is silly, and don’t always pay adequate homage to it, in their wives’ and girlfriends’ opinions. So don’t feel totally alone if your man/or woman doesn’t make a big deal of it. Personally, I love Valentine’s Day, with the right person, in the right circumstances. If not, well, that’s how it is, this year, but not necessarily forever. There’s always next year, which may be a whole lot better, and just as you wish!!! Dreams DO come true!!

I hope your Valentine’s Day is lining up as a real winner, with wonderful surprises in store, maybe even a proposal, or at least a romantic evening!!! I am buried in work at the moment, so I have a feeling that mine will involve me and a box of chocolates at my desk, but you never know. Prince Charming may be lurking out there somewhere, if he isn’t at home watching sports on TV. I have a busy week ahead before that, with a business trip to visit some of the big distributors of my books. It’s something I’ve never done before, but a good thing to do, to meet the people who make a big difference in my work life, and work hard for me, even though we never see each other. So I thought it was a good time to get out there, meet them, and say thank you. So many people are part of the process before my books actually reach you. Editors, publishers, wholesalers, distributors, bookstore owners, supermarket chains, shippers, truckers, printers, book binders, the art departments who come up with the covers, PR people. The list of those involved is dizzying, and I rarely have an opportunity to meet any of them, or thank them. So I’m taking a couple of days to do it. It’s new for me, exciting, and a little scary to get out in the big world, and meet new people as part of the business process. It’s a lot easier staying cozily at home, in a couple of warm ratty old sweaters or my nightgown, at my desk, writing the books for you. That’s the fun part for me. But it seems appropriate to thank some of the people involved, that neither you nor I ever see, but are an important part of the process too.

I was reading some of your responses to my blogs the other day, and some of what you wrote moved me to tears. It means so much to me to know that the books are meaningful to you, that they helped you in some way, and resonated, or that you just had fun with them and enjoyed them. And although I can’t answer all the comments, please please know how much they mean to me and touch me. I am sooooooo very grateful for your support, your kindness, your loyalty, and your very generous words. Writing a book is a very solitary process, you pull the story out of your head, and the feelings out of your gut and heart, weave it all together, and spend a long time writing, re-writing and polishing it, and send it out in the atmosphere like a balloon floating through the skies, and hope that it lands in the right hands, of someone who will care about it, and love it, and that it will have meaning to. It touches me deeply and means the world to me to know that the books mean a lot to you too.

There are a lot of other options to reading books these days, far more than there used to be, most of them on the Internet. You can watch movies at home, send photos on Instagram, tweet, watch funny videos, play video games, or look for the love of your life on Internet dating. Or just hang out at home, watch TV, or play with your dog. People don’t read as much as they used to, so your reading the books is very important to me, given all the other distractions we all have. And the world is serious business these days, with drama happening every time we turn on the news. I still love relaxing, and even escaping, with a good book, and I’m glad and grateful that you do too!!! And I’m very, very grateful that you read mine.

So I hope that this Valentine’s Day will be the best one ever for you—–full of romance and roses and chocolates, and hopefully dinner with someone you’re crazy about. And if not, there is always next year!!! Life is so full of wonderful surprises, that’s the best part of it, you never know what’s going to happen, and even if you’re watching TV alone at home this year, you may be madly in love with someone fantastic next year. You really never know what life has in store, at any age or stage of life, and something wonderful may be just around the corner. And please know that whatever happens, wherever you are, year after year, you are my Best Valentine every year!!!!

with all my love, Danielle

1/26/15, Be Careful

Posted on January 26, 2015

Hi Everyone,

I hope all is going well. It seems weird to think that the holidays were only a few weeks ago, it feels more like months!!! I’m plunged into the New Year, and getting very busy now with meetings and writing.

I had an experience a few days ago, which seems smart to share. It’s something that happens in every city and country, and is a product of our sometimes troubled world and economy, I guess. You read about it in the newspapers, often with a very unhappy ending, and it really is smart to be careful!!!

Two men rang the intercom to my apartment in the morning a few days ago. They said they were from the gas company, but wore no uniforms or anything to identify them as from the gas company. They said they had to come in to “photograph around the apartment, to look for my gas meters, because the gas company was planning to change them”. The hour was not unusual: 10 am, but the story seemed odd to me. Not impossible, but maybe a little off. My gas meters had been changed for newer ones a year or so ago. The men did not look particularly official, had no uniform, or cap or badge to make them seem official (although some people are in full uniform and can be frauds too!!). And there was no way I was letting 2 strange men into my apartment, to wander around, taking photographs. In France, we always receive a letter from any maintenance company (gas, phone, alarms, etc.) well in advance, often weeks in advance to warn us of such a visit. I had had no letter to warn me, which was the most suspicious part of their plan. I called the gas company quickly, and miraculously, a person answered, not a machine, and they told me that it was a bogus story, they were not sending anyone out on missions like that, and had sent no one to me. I then went back to the intercom where the men were still waiting, and I told them I was not letting them in. They got nasty then, and threatened me, and they said that if I didn’t let them in immediately, they would cut my gas line then and there (which they couldn’t do, I’m sure), and I told them to do whatever they wanted, they weren’t coming in. They argued about it very aggressively for a while. Without telling them, I called the police. The men must have realized the ruse wasn’t working, and they left, before the police came. The police said it was a common ruse, and unless I had some real proof that the mission was real (an advance warning letter in the mail from the gas company), never let people like that in. It was the first time it had ever happened to me. I had only recently issued warnings about things like that to my family who stay with me, and people who work for me. But only when you are nose to nose with it, does it bring the point home. And I think that the recent violence in France has made people more cautious, but this is a scenario which has always worried me. And now I saw it in action.

I could so easily imagine some much older person, alone, faced with threats of cutting off their gas, letting people like that into their home. And then, only God knows what would happen: a robbery, a theft, a mugging, an assessment for a future robbery, or worse. It can happen to any unsuspecting person, or even in a distracted moment when you let your guard down.

Companies like Federal Express in France don’t have enough regular employees, so they often send out workers they subcontract with, with no Uniform or official indicators, to deliver packages and letters. I never let them in, because there is nothing to prove that they are what they say. But a uniform isn’t a guarantee either. Plenty of robbers or bad people show up in official uniforms, as mailmen, delivery people, and even police, and are frauds. You need to be careful even of delivery people, someone with an armload of flowers for you, you open the door, and then there’s trouble. I was lucky that these two were so transparent.

I remember a few years ago, a serial rapist in New York was wearing a full legitimate police uniform, ringing doorbells, and young women let them in, and then terrible things happened. Another was masquerading as a fireman. If you have not called for help, and are not expecting a package, delivery or serviceman, be VERY, VERY, VERY careful, and better yet, don’t open the door and let them in!!

I’m not suggesting that you become totally paranoid, hide under your bed, and keep your doors locked forever. But we all need to be wise and careful, alert, and suspicious enough to protect ourselves. Don’t just open the door to anyone, try to be as sure as you can that the person at the door is for real, and if you have any doubt at all, don’t open the door, particularly if you’re alone. You’re better off delaying or even losing a legitimate package than getting hurt, robbed, or worse. The police told me that this is a very common occurrence, and whenever you aren’t sure of the people at the door, DON’T let them in.

So please be careful!!! Take good care!!! Be Safe!!!

much love, Danielle

1/19/15, Paris in January

Posted on January 19, 2015

Hi Everyone,

I hope the New Year is rolling along nicely in its first few weeks. The world seems a little bumpier than usual right now in these first days of the year. In my blog last week, I mentioned the tragedies in Paris, and am noticing the mood in Paris in the aftermath. I think when anything shocking happens, people retreat into their shell for a while to try and figure out what happened, and why, and how they feel about it.

January is a quiet month in most places. People have gotten through the holidays and are tired, the weather tends to be dreary everywhere, gray and cold, rainy or snowy, except if you live in a tropical place somewhere. Two years ago, I stayed home in January in bitter cold weather in Paris, and discovered the TV series Downton Abbey and fell in love with it, and became addicted to it. It’s also a good month to stay home and catch up on work. Nothing much seems to happen in January. And I usually do a lot of writing this month.

And this year, January has happened with a jolt, with the events in Paris. The reaction of French people has been one of strength. Only days after the events which riveted the attention of the world and turned all eyes toward Paris, they held a ‘solidarity rally’, in which 2 million people showed up in a public square in Paris, walked about ten blocks, many of them arm in arm, and holding signs—and quite amazingly was attended by almost every Head of State and Crowned Head in Europe, Africa and parts of the Middle East. They came together to show their support for the people of France after the sad events and attacks that had happened. I was in New York at the time, and cried as I watched the March on CNN. It was extremely moving, old people, young people, world leaders, Presidents, little children. It represented almost half the population of Paris and the surrounding suburbs, and was an extraordinary heartwarming and peaceful event.

A week after the intense drama began, with attacks, deaths, hostage situations, and suicide missions carried out, the mood of Paris is quiet and pensive. Much like the atmosphere in New York after 9/11, which was a far bigger event, in terms of loss of life, the city and its people seem silent and somewhat withdrawn, almost like someone who has been injured and needs to be in a quiet place for a while to think about it and heal from the shock. It is an odd combination of emotions, both sadness and strength, determination not to be terrorized or victimized, respect for those who died, and although quiet, the people seem very brave and strong. There are noticeably fewer people on the streets, and in restaurants and stores, fewer cars, less traffic. People seem very serious, and wisdom dictates staying out of big public places that could be vulnerable: the subway, department stores, big stadiums, some people are avoiding places of worship, so as not to draw attention to themselves. Like any time of mourning, it is a time to turn inward, rather than reach outward, and yet the march last weekend was an extraordinary reaching out in unity and show of strength. But it is also a harsh awakening to the risks and dangers of our troubled world, with the realization that people are vulnerable in every country around the world. Just as 9/11 was a tremendous wake up call in the US, I think these recent events in France were a similar sounding of the alarm in France that they can be at risk in a grocery store, at work or at home.

The big event in January in Paris usually is the sales. The government demands that all stores hold sales in January and July, with terrific bargains of great goods, marked down up to 70%. Stores don’t get to just do sales randomly whenever they want, and they are expected to put their past season’s merchandise on sale during those two months. It usually creates a festive atmosphere, draws shoppers to Paris from all over France, and even from other countries. People come for bargains and pretty things, the streets and stores are crowded, and traffic gets very congested. This month though, the city is almost eerily quiet, with few people in the stores, and no sign of traffic or the usual excitement about sales. Maybe it will pick up before the month is over, as people recover from the trauma to the city and the nation, but suddenly buying a sweater on sale, or a pair of shoes, seems insignificant compared to the bigger issues. I have a feeling that the sales won’t do as well this month as they normally do.

And even farther along the spectrum, in the last days of January is fashion’s Haute Couture week, with really beautiful fashion shows held by important designers of Couture clothes: clothes that have to be ordered, take several months to make and are entirely handmade (every stitch!!). They are extremely beautiful, and works of art, and also extremely expensive given the man-hours it takes to create them. France has always made a big fuss about Couture week, and about its fashion industry, ready to wear as well. Weeks after a national tragedy, it’s hard to imagine people coming from many different countries to view the fashions on the runways. But it’s an industry as well as an art, and people are resilient. And I’m sure that in a few weeks, people will be ready to see the shows, and ready to return to life. Chanel and Dior are the two most important houses that produce the clothes, and there are a number of others. And maybe after a few weeks of silent mourning, people will be ready to face the world again, and think of fashion. For now, it is quiet in Paris, and the mood is somber and strong. And in some ways, maybe it will be a relief to think of something more frivolous, and turn back the clock to an easier, simpler time. France has survived Revolution, Occupation, and two wars. The French are strong people, and they will come through this as well…..and for now, their serious quiet mood seems appropriate. It is the right reaction for the time, and perhaps good for all of us, wherever we are, to think of what’s important to us, what freedoms are essential to us, and what national values, or even what personal values we believe in. A little serious thinking never hurts. And the outpouring of support from other countries has been amazing.

We live in challenging times. I hope that your life is peaceful and all is well with you. And I’ll be writing to you about the fashion shows in a few weeks, when I go to see one by Chanel. Take care.

love, Danielle

1/12/15, Deepest Sympathy

Posted on January 12, 2015

Hi Everyone,

It has taken me several days to catch my breath enough to write to you about the violence and tragedy in Paris last week. Everything one can say sounds trite, the words are not enough. The very idea of violence against our fellow man shocking, the results whatever the reason shocking, and in the end, despite politics and religion, it is about lives lost. Not just lives you see on TV in alarming videos, or read about in the newspaper, when violence occurs and people die, but someone’s father, mother, husband, child, someone we love or respect or care about is gone forever, and the lives they touched are forever changed.

For years we have read about civil wars, nowadays we read about terrorism, and not only committed by foreigners, but in our own country, by our own people as well. It is inexplicable and terrifying, heartbreaking, and part of our daily lives now. Whether 9/11 or the Boston Marathon, or the tragedy in Paris, or a lone gunman on a college campus, the children murdered at the school in Connecticut a year or two ago, or a number of years ago the children shot and killed in an Amish school, or in Colorado, and in the bombing in Oklahoma 20 years ago. Whatever the reason, or whoever the perpetrators, in the end, it is about the people who were lost, and the families who must live on without them. And our hearts ache immeasurably for those who died, for those who love them, and even for ourselves. We each lose a part of ourselves as well when tragedies occur, we lose our faith, our peace, our trust, our confidence that we are safe, and things will turn out well, and even that our children are safe.

Throughout the centuries, and all through time, religious causes have driven people to kill each other. It is an age old story, but one we are never inured to. It is always shocking, but it is not new. Today we see it more vividly on TV, cell phone videos, and computer screens. But the story is the same, the loss as agonizing. And each time something like this happens, no matter who does it, we are stunned into silence, we are grief stricken, and our hearts ache.

I am so deeply sorry for the families and loved ones of those who died in Paris last week. Whatever the political opinions or religions of the people involved, in the end it is about each person who was lost. We question what could or should have been done differently, why it happened, and in some cases why we didn’t suspect it could or would. It is always difficult to understand the reasons for man’s cruelty to each other at times, and the justifications. It is difficult to understand why it happens or that it does at all. How does a crazed student or young person slip through the cracks, climb over the barriers in their own head, and kill innocent children? Or in another case, kill the parents of innocent children.

We are all traumatized by this. I hear grief in the voice of everyone I speak to in my second home in France. People are subdued and shocked and sad. We all suffer a loss through something like this, and it breeds fear, anger, and cynicism.

We don’t know why it happens, why a breaking point is reached. We pray it won’t happen again. I fear there will always be tragedies of this kind; it is the nature of the human race. And for those of us in the outer circles of public events like this, we are helpless to change it, or make it better, or prevent it from happening again. I am reminded of something Mother Teresa said “We cannot do big things, only small things with an immense amount of love”. Let us do the small things, let us live our lives in love, let us make our small circle of life and the world better because we’re in it. And let us hope that those who perpetrate tragedies will find mercy in their hearts in future. Let the families and loved ones heal, and may those who have died in violence find peace.

When my son Nick died, a suicide at 19, I caught a very bad cold that turned into pneumonia shortly after. I went to my doctor, a kind man, who gave me a ‘dreidel’, the little top that is a tradition at Chanukah in the Jewish faith. It has Hebrew letters on it which say “A great miracle happened here”. When he gave it to me, I thought he was crazy. How could a miracle possibly have happened when my son was dead? But in time, it proved to be true, we started two foundations in his name to help the mentally ill and the homeless and we have helped thousands of people since his death. I wrote a book about him, his life and his illness, which over a million people have read, and it helped many of them. I have spoken out about mental illness, which has helped dispel some of the stigma and mystery around mental illness. One boy, my son, started all of that and caused it to happen, which is a miracle in a way. So many, many lives were touched because of his death. And when there is a tragedy, there is a miracle in it too. It can spawn empathy, understanding, compassion, forgiveness, change, it can be a bridge between grieving people, bring people closer together, and change lives. My prayer is that somewhere in the ashes of this tragedy, there will be a miracle for those who have survived and for the rest of us. May a miracle we cannot even guess at now eventually emerge? And to those who have lost loved ones, my deepest sympathy. And may we all do small things to help and comfort each other, with an immense amount of love.

With all my love to you, Danielle

12/15/14, Busy Days

Posted on December 15, 2014

Hi Everyone,

It’s less than two weeks before Christmas, and I’ve definitely been busy on the holiday circuit, and with holiday activities, and it has been fun. It’s a nice time of year to spend time with people you care about and enjoy, not just the ‘have to go to’ parties or the ‘think I should’s’. I weeded those out a few years ago, so I get to spend time with people I really consider friends.

This week was a bit of a whirlwind. On Monday I gave a lunch for my women friends, we see each other pretty regularly, so there wasn’t a lot of ‘catch up’ to do, just talking about our plans for the holidays, our families, and latest news, and taking time out from the rush to enjoy each other and have a civilized lunch. There were 7 of us at lunch, since five others couldn’t make it. Almost all of us work, and several of them still have young school age kids at home, and those activities take precedence, for all of us. Or work obligations. It was really fun to have lunch, and to discover that one of the group is having a baby, her fourth, which is brave of her, since she has a big career as an attorney, and a cardiologist husband, and 3 older children, so she has a very full life, but is very excited about this baby. And we were all thrilled for her!! They don’t have baby showers in France, that’s an American tradition, but I’m going to have one for her before the baby comes.

On Tuesday, I had lunch with one of my closest friends, which we do often, to discuss whatever is happening in our lives and enjoy each other’s company. He’s a male best friend, so we also give each other the benefit of the opposite sex perspective on situations, and that can be very helpful at times!! We always have a wonderful time together! And that night, I was invited to an interesting dinner given by American friends, an ex-Ambassador and his wife. And they invited me and a friend to meet the new American Ambassador to France, who is a charming woman. The ambassadorial post in France is not given to a career diplomat, but always to a major supporter of the current president, so it brings some very interesting people to the job, which is an appointment by the President. It was a fun evening and a small dinner of about 10 people, so a good chance to talk to her.

On Wednesday, I had lunch with my co-producers of the song album I wrote the lyrics for last year. And it was nice to catch up with them, and that’s a whole different milieu, since music was very new to me, and not my usual professional world.

On Thursday (which is Saint Danielle Day in France, my saint’s day. Saint Danielle!!), I gave my Christmas party, with 30 good friends, it was what the French call a ‘dining cocktail party’, officially it’s a cocktail party, but that tells people that there will be enough food passed around, or set up on a table that you won’t starve to death if you decide to stay. And in France, all parties go longer, so people will come to a cocktail party and stay til 1 or 1:30 am, which is what happened. It was the group of my social circle in France, and we really had a nice time together, particularly because everyone knows each other well. It was fun!!

And on Friday, I had lunch with a women’s group (of 5 women) that I belong to, and we meet once a month, usually for dinner, but everyone is so busy right now that we met for lunch. And that was really fun too. We all gave each other small gifts, one of them gave me some ‘lotto’ tickets, and I won $10.00 !!!! And Friday night, I went to a Shabbat dinner at the friends who are having the baby. They have a Friday night dinner every week, where friends come for dinner, and stay for long conversations. The food is plentiful, the discussions interesting, the people varied, and their children and their children’s friends come to dinner too. It’s a warm family gathering that everyone enjoys, and I love being invited to their Friday night dinners, with the lighting of the candles, the opening prayer, the traditions, and the lively atmosphere after the formalities. It’s always a special evening to be with them and their friends.

And today, I stayed home to work, and started packing to leave. Tomorrow, my God daughter and her family are coming to dinner. She is four years old, incredibly adorable and irresistible, and we’ll all open presents under my Christmas tree. It has been a thrill to give the little girls I know my new children’s book, “Pretty Minnie in Paris!”, which has wonderful illustrations, and even glitter on the cover, and so far they have all loved it (and so have some of my grown up friends!!) It’s about a little teacup Chihuahua who lives in Paris, and loves to wear pretty clothes. And the illustrations by Kristi Valiant are fabulous!!!

So this week has been all pre-Christmas events, all of which I’ve enjoyed. And last weekend I stayed home to wrap presents—which I am terrible at, and they all look like someone was blindfolded while they did it. Wrapping presents is not my strong suit!!
And before I leave Paris, I’ll have lunch with another good friend, and on my last night here before the holidays, two friends are coming to dinner.

Next week, once I leave Paris, I’m going to spend a day with one of my daughters to celebrate her birthday and have dinner with her and her friends, on the way home. I have a business meeting too, and then back to California for all our family Christmas traditions, and a chance to see some friends too. And I give a lunch every year with Santa present for all the really little children I know. I’ve been doing that since my own children were that small.

So, as you can see, I’ve been caught up in the whirl of Christmas, still doing a lot of shopping, seeing a lot of friends, and still managing have time to work, on a new book outline, some re-writes, and editing a set of ‘galleys’, which is the last stage in “book production”, my last chance to make corrections before a book goes to the printer and is turned into an actual book.
I do love the busy-ness of Christmas, the chance to see friends I love, the excitement of finding just the right gift for someone and hoping they’ll be excited about it, and the quiet moments when you think about what it all means, and inevitably, you think of the people who were part of your Christmas and no longer are, like my late son Nick. There are always some very nostalgic bittersweet moments to the season, but on the whole, happiness prevails.

So that’s what I’ve been up to. I hope your Christmas is off to a good start, and even if it falls short in some way, or the people you love aren’t around, it is a finite number of days, and you know it will be over soon. Before it is, I hope you have some wonderful days and evenings, and some special moments with loved ones and friends.

I am thinking of you, and send you much love, on holidays, and at any other time.

all my love, danielle

12/1/14, How Little We Know

Posted on December 1, 2014

Hi Everyone,

I hope Thanksgiving went well for you, and turned out as you wished.

The Sunday before Thanksgiving, I went to a famous church in San Francisco, Glide Memorial, which is a free form protestant/Christian experience, a church where the founder and pastor is an extraordinary man, Reverend Cecil Williams, and their extensive charitable foundations are run by his exceptionally wonderful wife, Janice Mirikatani. The music there is fabulous, and is Gospel with a large musical ensemble, the message is flawless and calls us to put our actions where our Faith is. It really spoke to me when he said that we wait for God to act on our behalf, but maybe God is waiting for us to act, to demonstrate our faith. I liked that a lot, and he urged us not to Talk Love, but to Live it. I took friends from Europe there, and I always come out of that church feeling terrific and full of energy and renewed faith. Glide is exceptional because they have countless programs for the poor and homeless, education, health and housing programs, detox, and an amazing free meal program, where they serve close to 900,000 free meals a year, lunch and dinner. Cecil and his wife Janice are truly an inspiration!! It got my Thanksgiving week off to a great start, and as he said, the emphasis should be on Giving.
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