Archive for 2022

1/17/22, Lonely

Posted on January 17, 2022

 

Hi Everyone,

 

Well, we’re two weeks into the new year, and hopefully you’re off to a great start, and good things are already unfolding. I’ve already had one terrific surprise, in the past week. I learned that my new book “Invisible”, in hardcover, determined after only five days of sales, will be Number 1 on the New York Times Bestseller list this coming Sunday, and my new paperback “Neighbors” will be Number 1 on their paperback list. And I have another paperback still on that list, “All That Glitters.” That definitely gets my year off to a VERY happy start!! I hope you’ll have time to read it, and will love it.

 

Today is a very important day, Martin Luther King Day, one of the great historical figures of our times, and an extraordinary man, a great and inspiring religious leader who had a tremendous political and historical impact on the battle for desegregation in the United States at the time. He was an inspiration to all, and left the world a better place for having been here, and his murder was a tragedy for the world. He will be remembered and admired forever in our history.

 

I find that January is always kind of a bleak, dreary month. The weather is bad almost everywhere. Life is always slower after the holidays. And this year, we’ve begun the year at the height of the peak of another wave of Covid that has hit the world hard, with the Omicron variant. There are a myriad theories about it, that it’s less severe than earlier variants, but more contagious, that it’s a good sign that the virus is weakening, and then contradictory opinions. We are all eager to see the end of the virus altogether and the sky high numbers of new cases around the world are discouraging and frightening. I long for the time when this is all behind us, and life returns to normal again, and every day is no longer a challenge of testing, masking, distancing, vaccinating, boosting, and worrying about Covid. Let’s hope that this year it will finally disappear from our lives, or at the very least become no more dangerous than the common cold. Wouldn’t that be nice!!!

 

In the holiday letters I received, and conversations I’ve had, two words have caught my attention. Words that people don’t speak often or admit to, and are now talking about openly. The two words are ‘lonely’ and ‘disconnected’. I can’t remember a time when people said to me openly, or wrote in a letter, “I’m so lonely” or “I feel so disconnected.” In a way, I think it’s actually a good thing that people are actually saying it now, if that’s what they’re feeling. In the past, I think people were embarrassed to admit it, but it’s out in the open now. It has been one of the great impacts of Covid: isolation, solitude, either from quarantines, from being sick, out of fear of getting sick, from working at home remotely, or not being in school, millions of people have been affected, separated from their loved ones. Adult children have not seen their elderly parents in order to protect them, College kids haven’t seen their friends or been able to make new ones. Curfews, lockdowns, fear, and good judgement have isolated all of us from each other. I spent fifteen months of the last two years separated from my children, which was unimaginable to me before Covid. And even now, travelling to visit them, which I did once a month before is much more challenging and travel is often dangerous, or just before you’re about to see someone, they have been exposed to someone with Covid and are in quarantine and isolating. It is MUCH harder to see people now, and nearly impossible to have a social life. Going to parties isn’t wise, even if vaccinated, you think twice about inviting anyone to your home, and people are just tired of the cautions, restrictions and dangers, and it all becomes too complicated, so people wind up staying home alone.  It takes real effort and consideration to maintain connections with people. I think we’re all beginning to realize that solitude does take a tremendous toll, and we do need to make that effort to stay connected to others, we need to see our family and friends, those connections are important to all of us and our wellbeing, and I think we all need to make that extra effort so we aren’t lonely. The emotional and psychological effects of the pandemic are just as dangerous as the physical ones. It’s something to think about and be aware of as we start a new year. A promise to ourselves to stay connected to other people, so that the word lonely is no longer the first word we think of to describe ourselves and how we’re feeling.

 

I’m starting the year off working on two books, which is usually how I start every year: writing. It’s a good month to stay home and write. Writing is always isolating because you have to stay home alone to do it. But I am going to make more effort now to see people between books, as part of my own commitment to stay connected!!

 

My daughter Beatrix sent me a terrific quote today of Robin Williams. He was a lovely man, and I was lucky to know him. His son and my daughter dated all through high school, and my family has remained friends with his ever since. Robin was as funny in private as he was on screen, but the side of him I loved and always impressed me was that he was an absolutely wonderful father and adored his children. The quote my daughter sent me was “Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always”/Robin Williams. It’s a good thing to keep in mind. Life is a daily battle to stay on course and keep your ahead above water, and in the pandemic, you have to fight that much harder.

 

I hope you have a wonderful, easy week, full of good news, good surprises, good times, and blessings.

 

Take Care. love, Danielle

1/10/22, Sidney Poitier

Posted on January 10, 2022

 

A beloved friend has passed away. I have met three or four truly extraordinary people in my lifetime, who made a life changing impact on me, and on the world. Sidney Poitier was among those few. An icon, a legend, a brilliant man, a rare soul, immensely talented, elegant of spirit, wise, gentle, powerful, his voice was mesmerizing, he lit up the world, beautiful in every way, a treasured friend, vastly admired by all who knew him. I was so lucky to know him, he was a wonderful writer, as well as a brilliant actor. So many talents in one person. So much goodness in one soul. Full of fun and mischief, dignity and gravitas, wonderful husband to Joanna, and father to his daughters, and extraordinary friend. He chose his roles carefully for the ethics he portrayed, the message he delivered. He came to San Francisco secretly once, and hid in a hotel, in order to surprise me at a gala event with an award I cherish, for my work with our foundation for the mentally ill. He led a wonderful life, left millions with the gifts of his talent, he had a noble run and lived to a great age. But there is a hole in the world today, and in my heart knowing he is gone. My children and I mourn him. He left us all infinitely richer for having known him. Godspeed, beloved friend, we will miss you

 

photo credit: Thomas J. Gibbons

1/3/22, Homage to Betty White

Posted on January 3, 2022

 

Hi Everyone,

 

A new year has begun, and I am really hopeful for 2022. 2020 absolutely sucked from March onwards. And 2021 ,as we figure out how to live with Covid, and put our lives back together again, has been kind of an up and down process, with Covid spikes, cancelled plans, businesses still precarious, and the discovery that the vaccines usually keep people from dying, but they don’t keep people from getting sick. I think most people have been incredible good sports about rolling with it, and making the best of a difficult situation, which isn’t over yet. We want it to be, and I believe we’ll get there, but we’re still wrestling with Covid. I am REALLY hoping that 2022 will see the last of it as a major threat. Hopefully, it will either burn itself out as some viruses do (like the Spanish Flu), or it will shrink from dragon size, to something more human scale, like an ordinary flu. I am betting heavily on 2022 being a good year, even a very good year. We deserve a break after a very tough two year battle.

 

And as we move forward, I want to pay tribute to a remarkable woman, a legend, an icon, and from all I hear from others, she was an extraordinary, wonderful human being. Betty White, the actress, who died last Friday, and would have turned 100 in two weeks. I only a few days ago mentioned her and how much I admire her. She worked right up until the end of her life, when others retire and disappear years earlier. She stayed front and center, and kept working, and was successful until the end. And I have always heard that she was a lovely person. She truly became an icon and a legend, as a human being, and she was a very fine actress and wonderful comedian. I loved her in the movie “The Proposal”, and other parts I saw her play on TV. (The Golden Girls was one of her best roles). She even hosted Saturday Night Live and was the oldest person ever to do so. (And she didn’t look old. She was amazingly pretty even at her age.) She had a delicious sense of timing and a wicked wink. And acting is no easy business, even less so as actors get older. She just stayed in there, right up until the end. I admire Honesty, kindness, integrity and hard work, and she won on all counts. She made me laugh hard in all her comedic roles. And there is nothing so fun and therapeutic as a good laugh!!

 

I wrote my first book at 19, and Agatha Christie was an icon and legend then, and she also kept writing wonderful books until the end of her career. I admired her greatly as I started my career. The French singer Charles Aznavour was my teen age idol, and he too, worked hard until he passed away in his high nineties a year or two ago. I saw him in concert when he was about 92, and he was as talented, amazing, and wonderful to watch and listen to as he always was. He performed for two and a half hours onstage, never took a break, and was on his feet for the entire time. You really have to admire and celebrate that kind of dedication. I truly admire hard work. I think it keeps people vital, engaged in the world, and alive. It’s also a matter of good luck to have good health. But if the body and mind allow, I enormously respect people who stay creative and hard working.

 

I hope to be one of those people one day, to go on writing forever, until the end. I’ve pretty much only done two things in my life: raise children and write. My children are well on their way now, so that leaves writing, and I don’t ever want to stop. I can’t imagine what I would do with myself if I stopped writing. I am a lousy cook, I don’t have a green thumb and have no interest in gardening, I haven’t played golf since boarding school (and only took lessons because the golf teacher was very handsome. I don’t think I ever learned to play the game). I love to play poker, but never learned to play bridge. I love doing needlepoint but couldn’t make a full time job of it. And my knitting is terrible, with holes all over the place. I used to draw, and went to design school, but had no great talent. I was never a good tennis player. Hiking bores me. So that leaves writing, and I hope to keep on writing forever, far into the future, as long as I can sit in a chair and pound on the keys of my trusty typewriter. I think I want to work forever, I just can’t imagine doing anything else, or ever stopping. I need to write, like I need to breathe air.

 

And I read recently that Betty White said she attributed her long life and good health to never eating anything green, and I’ve always said that the only thing green I like are emeralds. (I hate most green vegetables, after being forced to eat large quantities of them in my childhood. I much prefer chocolate).

 

It is a great gift to be able to make people laugh. Betty White made me laugh often and hard, and she did it so elegantly. She seemed like a lovely person, and I have always admired her from afar.

 

So I bow to Betty White for a life well lived, right to the end, which must have come swiftly, and hopefully gently, since she was giving interviews on turning 100 just last week, and on Friday she was suddenly gone, perhaps gently in her sleep.

 

Godspeed, Lovely Lady, for a life so well lived, and a graceful exit after her final bow. She gives us something to aspire to with her shining example. I can still imagine her winking at me now.

 

Have a wonderful week, and I hope this brand new year is off to a fabulous start!!!

 

love, Danielle